What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
