Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
