ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
