Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
