How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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