ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
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