So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
