Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
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