i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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