Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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