My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize