"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
