I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
