Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
