Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
