I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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