you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
