How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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