You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
