Sry I called you an 8
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize