Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
