I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Randomize
