i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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