Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
