So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
