Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
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