Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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