I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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