Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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