There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
You're like the curious george of whores
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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