i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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