Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
