yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
