its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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