Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
