Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I just want to make out with him forever
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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