Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
