why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
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