Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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