Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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