So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize