i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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