with your own penis?
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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