I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
