hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
