i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
