Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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