remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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