I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
