We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
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