So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
