im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Randomize
